All Posts By Christine Arylo

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Grow New Buds

by Christine Arylo on November 1, 2014 at 2:05 pm

SAF_LLAF_GrowBuds_404X404Did you ever notice that most women have friends, but few of us have been educated on how to grow and cultivate friendships that nourish, grow deeper over time and ultimately give more than they take? Even if we have friends we’ve known for years, or we have a lot of friends in number, most women lack – and crave – deeper soul sister connections. In my work with women around the world as a coach and relationship expert, I hear again and again how lonely women are for meaningful, truly supportive friendships, or how often they hang onto the wrong friendships, just like staying in the wrong romantic relationship, and so there is no space for new buds to come in.

The truth is that just like things in nature, like flowers and plants, there is a season for everything. Annuals come back year after year, while some only bloom once. And we are okay with that, because we know if we plant new buds in the ground, new flowers bloom. We could learn a lot about friendship from flowers. Every friendship has a season, some a lifetime, others years and some just a few months — and when we let one friendship go, another will bloom in its place. Some flowers go together better than others, just like people, and the best flower arrangements come from intention and creativity. Flowers do better when loved and cared for, and when they are planted or presented in bunches, or grow together in fields or gardens.  Read More

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Open Up

by Christine Arylo on August 11, 2014 at 8:58 am

SAF_LLAF_OpenUp_404X404As a person who has dedicated her life to teaching people how to love well, I can say that most people I meet admit to me they would love to have more loving relationships, in which they feel loved – appreciated, cared for, and seen. Just like a flower needs water and sun to flourish, we humans need to give and receive love in order to truly thrive. The challenge is that unlike flowers, who naturally open themselves up to receive the sun and water on a daily basis, we humans default to keeping our hearts protected, so the love we seek has a hard time getting in. While we desire love, most of us are too scared of the vulnerability that opening our hearts requires.

Wow, can we learn a lot from a flower! Those smart buds don’t think twice about letting the sun and water in, they just open up and receive what they need to be nourished. What would it be like for you to open up your heart more, so that when love does show up, you could receive the love you seek instead of pushing it away or only letting a little in?

Build your love receptor muscles little by little, starting with sources of love that are guaranteed safe. For example, start interacting with things that are naturally loving. Did you ever notice how when you are around babies, puppies or flowers, that your heart opens up almost automatically, and love just comes pouring in? This is because these things have no fear factor. You feel safe opening your heart.  Read More

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Winter is great for many reasons — warm soup, fuzzy coats and toasty fires. And, it’s also a season in which on some days, it seems like the sun gets swallowed up by the moon, never to be seen again. Days are short, the landscape is grey and drab, and the temperature keeps you hiding inside. As a result, you start to feel just like the outside landscape — drab, sad and blah.

I lived this way for years, every February finding myself in a panic to escape the Midwest winter — put me on a plane to anywhere. But this got expensive, didn’t always fit my schedule and frankly, waiting until you get to the point where you just “have to” do anything isn’t the best way to make decisions. You spend more, waste time and usually don’t get what you need. One short burst of sun to combat the effects of the months of winter gloom just didn’t cut it. Read More

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There are lots of occasions over the holiday season when you feel obligated to bring a gift — whether it’s for the host of a holiday party or the person who’s opening their home to you for a meal or a stay. You know you are supposed to bring a gift and that you should, and so you do. And while it’s a nice gesture, you might be leaving love on the table. Giving gifts from the ‘shoulds’ is giving from obligation — and obligation creates ho-hum results at best, and stress and self-doubt at worst. Do yourself and your hosts a favor this holiday season and dare to give from love. How a gift is received and the impact it has is all about the come from.

You want them to feel special — to know that you appreciate them, and to stop for a moment during their busy hosting activities to really let the LOVE sink in. You have that kind of power. Especially when you tap into the love power of flowers. The secret is all in asking yourself the right question. Watch this video I taped for you where I share my secrets for gifting love to the people who are loving enough to invite you into their homes and I reveal the secret love question.

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How do you thank hosts for opening their home to you?

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Somewhere around the age of 27, I decided to look past the pilgrims, stuffed turkeys, and football games to find what Thanksgiving really meant to me. While the food was always good, and it was nice to see relatives and friends, there always seemed to be something missing. On a day that is expressly about giving thanks, I often ended Thanksgiving Day full of stuffing but with plenty of room still left in my heart for what I think every human being could use three, four, even infinite helpings of — LOVE.

So I decided to shake up the old traditions, shake off the stuffing and turkey malaise, and experiment with new, daring gratitude-filled Thanksgiving traditions. Following are three of my favorite ways to stuff myself with LOVE during the Thanksgiving season. Give them a try, and give yourself (and others) the gift of a heart full of love this holiday. Read More